Things that need explaining
1.
We call our favorite local grocery store Food Panther. Why? Mr. Spy has trouble with names. He doesn’t remember people’s names (he does better with men than with women, but I try not to hold it against him). He doesn’t remember store names. He was trying to remember the name of the grocery store the first week we moved in. The name he sought was Food Pantry, but he knew it wasn’t quite right, so it came out a bit jumbled and sounded like Food Panther. So that is what we call it. It especially amuses me because sometime in the distant past, I used to shop occasionally at Food Lion. What is the real name of the store? Food Train. Which doesn’t make any more sense than Food Panther. But to their credit, they keep mochi by the cash registers, so I will forgive them.
2.
We are overdue for applying for our new driver’s licenses. Why? Because the state of New York requires that you show your social security card to get a license. Not the number — the actual card. Mr. Spy doesn’t have a card. He doesn’t recall ever seeing the actual card. He downloads the application for a new card and discovers that there’s one thing he needs to show in order to submit his application — his driver’s license.
3.
We have, however, registered to vote. Have you?
We combined registering with the driver’s license and license plates endurance test. The state of Kansas implemented a new system which resulted in massive (i.e. HOURS long) delays. It was so bad that the state gave everyone an extra 30 days grace period in which to get DLs and plates renewed. At one point when I was there, the wait for the last person on the list was estimated at something like 16 hours . . .
Food Panther is a great name. We went to a Chinese restaurant in College Park, MD that we used to call “Kevin’s Chinese” because he found it, and all Chinese restaurants seem to have the same kinds of names.
Dealing with bureaucracy and staying registered to vote is easier in a small town, and I haven’t moved in 20 years, so we’re all set. The college kid registered to vote in her college state, where they made it easy for students.
We call our Food Lion “Food Monger”. I like Food Panther. I think animals are always hungry. I just wish there was an actual lion at the grocery store like the spider monkeys that used to live in a glass case at the back of the shoe store when I was a kid. Or…maybe not. I guess that’s no life for a lion. Or a panther.
I’ve dealt with motor vehicle departments in two states. Neither is fun. Looks like the 30 day requirement for new residents to get a NYS license ties in more with police being able to give a ticket for not having an in-state license and registration. The MV-44 form doesn’t seem to ask how long the applicant is a resident of the state. So I guess the solution is for Mr. Spy to use his non-NYS driver’s license to get a new Social Security card and then use that new card to get a NYS license… and try not to get any tickets in the mean time. Bureaucracy is SO FUN!