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The month of living dangerously

May 3, 2010

My subconscious must be going haywire this week. Yesterday it was Chaucer. Today it was the complete score of Benjamin Britten’s A Ceremony of Carols and also that dreadful song “I’ve never been to me.” I don’t even want to think about how that got in there.

May is always a hardscrabble month in the Spy household. There are many large bills due between mid-April and the beginning of June and May is right when I start to wonder if this is the year we’re not going to be able to hold it all together. This has been a particularly grim year in that regard, and it has not been helped by the recent bill of health on our aging van. Although I suppose it is good news that the mechanics did not say junk it, but rather thought if we threw some money at it — and really, it could have been worse; in the 3 digits at least, albeit on the upper end — it would keep going for a while. I like our mechanics and am inclined to trust them, particularly since they identified the problem the van’s been having for months in a matter of minutes when the dealer had puzzled it out for days and finally concluded “It’s probably the tires” (It wasn’t. It was the brakes). We let it sit at the mechanics’ over the weekend, wondering if it’s worth it to put any more money into a car that’s past the legal age of majority and almost old enough to buy liquor all by itself (a feature that might make sticking with the car more amenable, were it actually put into practice). But it’s better than buying a new car, I suppose. So I guess we’re signing on. It only needs to make local trips anyway.

I have a problem thinking and talking about money and especially any lack of it. It tends to send me into a tailspin of anxiety and catastrophization. But strangely, I am not too worried about the way the numbers are not currently adding up. It’s probably magical thinking, but I’m feeling like things are taking a new turn. We shall see. Maybe I’m just intoxicated by the fabulous smells that are everywhere — lilacs, honeysuckle, lily-of-the-valley, cherry trees. Everything is in bloom. Being broke in the spring is much easier than being broke in the winter, let me tell you.

And while we’re on the subject of magical thinking, I’d appreciate it if you’d all think some magical thoughts in Mr. Spy’s general direction on Wednesday when he auditions for that game show with a famous song and a once mustachioed Canadian host. He is feeling a bit nervous about it, I think.

In other news, AJ’s hand is doing much better, so much so that he begged to be allowed to return to gym class today. I find this amusing because when I was in school, I would have jumped at ANY excuse to get OUT of gym class. That is how we differ. But I called his doctor, and no go. We may bend the rules and let him play Wednesday night’s baseball game — his embenchment ends Thursday. But don’t tell the doctor.

And now I must go back to worrying whether AJ actually made it to his Cub Scout meeting after school. It has been a big step letting him go to his after school activities alone. I have gotten used to him coming and going to school unescorted, but when he has to be somewhere else, well, I kind of wish I knew when he got there. But I also know that his den leaders would call me if he didn’t show up. So all is well. And they probably won’t even notice if I ride by the house on my way to School of Rock. It’s *almost* on the way.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. freshhell permalink
    May 3, 2010 5:33 pm

    Well, I share your money pain. Until my husband’s job became full-time, this time of year, right as the semester ended, was the worst. And there are so many more end-of-the-school year expenses with this teacher gift and that party and field trip and most of them appearing out of thin air and all the other mothers stay-at-home with husbands with cushy jobs so they could all dream up fun stuff for the kids to do which required us all to buy a dozen million little things. Sigh.

    I’d hoped we’d be able to put a screened-in porch on this year but it is not to be. We will get the kid’s bathroom fixed before the mold destroys us all. And my husband has to find a new car with a brand new car payment. Whee!

    But, much luck to Mr. Spy. If he does get on, be sure to tell us and I’ll make a point of tuning in. I miss watching that show but it’s at a very busy and inconvenient time in this house. But I will set the clock to see a celebrity play TO WIN.

  2. May 3, 2010 10:44 pm

    Lots of luck to Mr. Spy, that’s very cool.

  3. May 4, 2010 7:59 am

    My favorite type of car: the one that is paid for

  4. May 4, 2010 12:21 pm

    Glad to hear last week’s sprain is healing fast. Walker is allowed to play soccer with his cast, but we have to tape bubble wrap around it so he won’t accidentally whap someone on the head and knock him out.

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